I’m trying to imagine what adoring me would like.
I put bundles in my kids’ hands as a minor legacy
My mother reminds me to put on my oxygen mask first. I cannot provide if I am unwell. I’ve been unwell, but better, but broken, & transfixed again. Getting a new install. A day in the sun. I’m going away in anticipation of my birthday. I’m getting back to my local woods. My demon wives carry me up the mountain & my scorpion children will bring me down. I’ve yet to fill my bundle. Yet to reach my goal but I’m hopeful. I need to upgrade. I have a new vision again.
Still, I am sifting through grief. Coloring in lines of betrayal translated as a misunderstanding. This has been a season of heartbreak. I’m baffled that no two shatter patterns share defining traits. I’m still alarmed at the way I can rage. I don’t feel as hopeless, so this gravity feels defensive. I’m too comfortable cutting of idle extremity. Every bridge I’ve been accused of burning, I suggested building in steel. I try not to link with an old line, but my love lies deep & long. Loyalty is a fragile beast I do not fear.
My anxieties are lighter, they hover. But each has a pinprick on their tips, making sure the trick is working. My mother tells me she’s proud & I can levitate again. I tell my prodigal child I love her as much as ever. The magic is difficult & potent these days. I’m feeling wet & electric. For my 29th solar return, I’m manifesting a breeze. The uncertainty of air. I’m invested in new nows & laborious tomorrow.
This Friday, 4/23 I’m celebrating 29! I’ll be sharing an original film by Chrishawn Julius West & going LIVE via IG at 7:30 PM PST to play music, answer questions, & more! If you want me to read a greeting or ask a question visit (jayydodd.net/bday)
We’re also just $2K+ from my #BDayBundle. Keep sharing & supporting!
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